Hetero marriages across US could be invalidated by Mass. Gov. Romney

Ok, this is gonna get fun now.

The anti-gay Republican governor of Massachusetts is using a 1913 state law to challenge gay marriages conducted in Massachusetts for out-of-staters. The law says that no one can be married in Massachusetts if their own home state wouldn't permit them to be married.

The problem is that there are some states, like Mississippi and Nebraska, which ban heterosexual marriages that would otherwise be legal in Massachusetts. So, if Governor Romney insists on back-checking ALL gay marriage already conducted by the state, then under the law he also must back-check all heterosexual marriages already conducted by the state. And if does that, there are going to be some very sorry heterosexuals in Mississippi, Nebraska and elsewhere. Here's why:

For example, Massachusetts permits an 18 year old to get married, no questions asked. Nebraska and Mississippi, however, require that same 18 year old to have a notarized consent form from their parent before conducting the marriage. If the Massachusetts clerks weren't presented with those consent forms, then the out-of-state heterosexuals weren't legally married (or so it would seem). There are lots of other requirements that vary by each state. If any of those were not met when an out of stater got married in Massachusetts, their marriage could be invalid.

What does that mean? It means lots of bastard children running around the US in heterosexual families. It means dad's having died without a will and the state giving everything to his wife, only to find out now that dad's wife was only some chick he was living in sin with. Now the kids can sue her for the inheritance. It also means that any benefit the supposedly married couple got - oh, from the federal government at tax time, for example - was also a fraud. You can see how this gets fun really quickly.

So, here's my challenge to your folks on the ground in Massachusetts. Call the local papers, and get a lawyer, and demand that Governor Romney execute the laws of the state in a fair and impartial manner, as he is required to do so under the Equal Protection clause of the US Constitution. Demand that the state of Massachusetts examine every single out-of-state marriage it has conducted over the past 100 years in order to ensure that thousands of fraudulent marriages have not been perpetrated on the marriage-loving, God-fearing, Bible-loving people of these United States of America. God bless.

Here are the requirements for the 3 states mentioned above:

MISSISSIPPI
Under 21: Parental consent is needed if under 21 years of age. If parents or guardians do not give consent at time of application, they will be notified via certified mail. The marriage application will be held for three (3) days. Marriage licenses cannot be issued to males under 17, or females under 15 years of age. If the clerk receives a signed authorization from the parents, this minimum age requirement can be waived.

NEBRASKA
Under 19: A certified copy of your birth certificate and a notarized consent form must be signed by the person's legal guardian giving consent to the marriage of the minor. Nebraska will not issue a marriage license if either applicant is under 17 years of age.

MASSACHUSETTS
Under 18: If you are under 18 years old, you will need a court order from either a probate court or district court in the locale where you live in order to apply for a marriage license.