Today is the first anniversary of the Massachusetts Supreme Judicial Court Decision legalizing same-sex marriages in that state. Since then, several thousand GLBT couples have tied the knot, and they're experiencing the same stressors and events that straight married couples are experiencing, but gay couples also have issues straight couples don't -- homophobia in the workplace, ostracism at church, disapproval by other family members, and so on. Like straight couples, many of them reach out to counselors to help them through this exciting and often difficult time. These counselors often look to the latest research and findings to help new marriages find their way.
However, The National Council on Family Relations and the Administration on Children and Families don't want gay couples to get that help. They're building an online "National Healthy Marriage Clearinghouse" that specifically excludes any research on gay marriage or gay families. Oh, and by the way, they have really been honest.
When NCFR and ACF announced last September they were working together on a National Healthy Marriage Clearinghouse, Administrator Wade Horn said the administration wouldn't use the online resource as a political tool on the issue of gay marriage.
Associated Press reported on Wade Horn:
He also indicated that the center won't take a position in the current debate on gay marriage. "If someone calls us or goes to the Web site, there's not going to be a question, 'What's your sexual orientation?'" he said. "It is not a referendum on gay marriage."On May 3, NCFR told its members in a letter and fact sheet:
As defined by ACF, the project has an exclusive focus on heterosexual marriages.Um, folks, when you have an "exclusive focus on heterosexual marriages," that's a referendum on gay marriage. So, in honor of the first anniversary of so many married couples, let's do some outreach.
Here is the list of people NCFR and ACF have decided will work on the anti-gay website:
Alan Hawkins, Brigham Young University hawkinsa@byu.edu (801) 422-7088We don't need to call them names. We need to ask them:
Kristin Anderson Moore, Child Trends kmoore@childtrends.org (202) 572-6000
Colita Nichols Fairfax, Norfolk State University cfairfax@nsu.edu (757) 823-9593
Alan Taylor, Syracuse University actaylor@syr.edu (315) 443-1639
Dean Busby, Texas Tech University dean.busby@ttu.edu (806) 742-3031
William Doherty, University of Minnesota bdoherty@che.umn.edu (612) 625-4752
How did you hear about the National Healthy Marriage Clearinghouse?And of course, there's NCFR executive director Michael Benjamin (mbenjamin@ncfr.org (202) 659-1190) who is clearly breaking NCFR's own rules to produce an anti-gay website for the Bush White House. You could always send him a friendly hello.
Were you part of a competitive process, or simply invited to participate on this project?
Who decided to specifically exclude research on gay marriage?
Do you agree with this decision?
Does your organization have a non-discrimination policy on gays?
Are you aware NCFR is breaking its own non-discrimination policy?
What's your position on same-sex marriage?
Did you ever work for the Administration on Children and Families?
Have you ever conducted or published research on same-sex relationships?
On this special anniversary for so many of us, let me just echo Wade Horn of ACF:
"Marriage is not a dirty word to most Americans," he said. "It doesn't work out for everyone, but most Americans aspire to it ... All we're saying is let's be on the side of people's aspirations.WE have aspirations, too. And it's our legal right. Don't let them forget that.
